To Jay. For Jay.

Dear Jayo,

Cancer is a word I’ve dread and always associated with fear.
I’ve heard a lot of tales about someone fighting from it.
Yours was the first that hit really close.

It changed things for you.
It changed things for me.
It changed things for us.
It forced us to look at our mortalities.

But it does not and cannot diminish LOVE.
Love from family.
Love from friends.

It does not change YOU unless you allow it.
It does not destroy friendship.
It does not claim good memories.
It does not take away the spirit.
It does not put out hope.

Despair? I’ve never seen or felt this overwhelm you.
Only FAITH. Realistic and rock solid faith.
Steady.
Strong.

Your spunk.
Your grit. Your backbone.
Your firmness of mind and spirit.
This continues to astound me.
I’ve never know anyone so steadfast!

When given a choice to sit this out
You stand up, put up your best stance and FIGHT!

If I haven’t met Michael, I would be taking a page of your book, and just read and travel, travel and read.

I feel guilty feeling happy or going out when you are at your hospital bed. But I know you would not want me to feel this way. I don’t know how to end my message, and I am crying now. I am comforted by the fact that you have amazing women in your life. Mama Des, Bjen and Langga. They are taking their cues from you. You are their glue. You are the glue that sticks them together. As Mama Des say, you are still the consummate planner. Always on top of things.

You are an inspiration!

Love you,

Ava

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4 thoughts on “To Jay. For Jay.

  1. Pingback: Makeover | grapesandoranges

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